Hillary Clinton Claims She Almost Joined the Marine Corps

Is Hillary Clinton that person at the bar who claims they almost joined the military?

“He looks at me and goes, ‘Um, how old are you?’ And I said, ‘Well I am 26, I will be 27,'” Clinton said. “And he goes ‘Well, that is kind of old for us.'”

“And then he says to me, and this is what gets me, ‘maybe the dogs will take you,’ meaning the Army.”

She meant “dogfaces.” In another version of the story, Clinton, then wearing thick glasses, said the recruiter included bad eyesight as a reason for being dismissed.

Maureen Dowd, a reporter for the New York Times, was as skeptical of Clinton’s claim as the world is now of Maureen Dowd. She noted Clinton’s status as an Ivy League, anti-establishment, anti-war, “up-and-coming legal star” would probably not make the Marines a real consideration for Clinton.

The Washington Post asked Marines who were Judge Advocate recruiters at the time if it would be possible the Marines would turn away a prime recruit with credentials like Hillary Rodham’s. The answer was a resounding no. Some lawyers in the Marines at the time “had coke bottle glasses” or “weighed 200 pounds.”

“Good news Everyone! I’m here to join your Marine Corps!”

Of course, the former First Lady’s almost-service certainly prepared her for the not sniper who didn’t shoot at her in Bosnia.

So your name is “Szneiper?” How do you pronounce that?

She could take some almost training from Donald Trump, who feels like he was in the military because he went to a military boarding school.

Clinton isn’t the only candidate with a fuzzy recollection of almost serving. GOP candidate Dr. Ben Carson recently admitted he was never offered  a “full scholarship” offer to West Point. Carson was found out when the world realized scholarships to West Point don’t exist and the dinner where Gen. William Westmoreland met Carson and would initiate the offer process didn’t happen because Westmoreland could not have been in Detroit as Carson claimed.

If the run for the White House doesn’t pan out, maybe Clinton and Carson can join the Almost-Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America to continue their almost service with Brian Williams.

This article originally appeared at We Are the Mighty.